Monday, April 21, 2008

Mountain Men

P.S. not noted: David Montgomery, aka"Ramrod". Prolific trapper of musk rats, beaver, raccoons, boy scouts, and leader of the "Mormon Battalion". Teller of tall tales, friend of the fur ball, hater of wolves, lover of chocolate chips and ice cream. This Arizona born Mtn. Man explored the wilds of Sandy Utah before following the call of the stealhead to the metropolis of the LoLo trail. He was closely associated with multiple Daves, known to run with the Dalton Gang as well as other knee capless ruffians. This character was well renowned for corrupting return and potential missionaries with his sideburns and goatee, terrified suburbanites with rules and structure, taught local school children to build rifles and long knives, and stirred contraversy with alum and rock salt. He was known to trade heavily in powder horns, mastadon, and plastic spoons. His lodge was always known to bring needed rains to the driest of climes, probably from his close communion with watercolors. He never met an old barn he would not do a painting of, a husky he would not do an engraving of, or an ear he would not bend. His jaw traps were legendary and will probably one day be his downfall.


Ryann said...

How's David related to you?

brohammas said...

Let's just say I was part of the "battalion". He taught me how to pitch a tipi, often argued with me about the length of my hair, and taught me to socialize with hairy men who wear nothing but a breach cloth and drink whiskey from a tin cup.